Love these lines.
You've nailed the rhyme, but the beat gets lost sometimes.
That's funny you should say because to be honest, this was more of a freak accident of rhyme than an exercise in rhythm. I didn't really have a beat in mind. I just made it up as I went along, really.
Aw wow.... I love this! I really love your ability to tell a story in vivid pictures. I read and see the whole thing playing out like a movie in clips and pictures. My heartstrings are tugged and I feel the emotion of it in gentle waves of each verse.
Very nicely done, Skander. Best of luck in the contest . I really believe you have captured the theme perfectly in your words here. You really put your heart into this!
It was a lovely start to my day to read this piece from you.