ShopDreamUp AI ArtDreamUp
Deviation Actions
Literature Text
It starts with loss,
The family torn apart, the friends lost and the peace shattered
By the darkest hearts, the most powerful weapons and the harshest diseases
Then comes grief with its tear-stained face and its anguished cries,
Drowned out by the speed of life
It doesn't make sense.
What did we do wrong?
Why is Heaven against us?
Along came misery with its stone cold silence
Bereaved hearts long encased in an iron shell, if only to fend off
The cold gun in their hands and the ledge of the roof in front of them
If there is a Heaven waiting for us to see our loved ones,
Let our death be hastened.
But the body hesitates and the mind awakens from its slumber
Roused by a single word
No
Heaven is going nowhere, it can wait a while longer
Justice has waited too long.
First comes loss, then grief, and then despair…until all that's left is defiance.
The family torn apart, the friends lost and the peace shattered
By the darkest hearts, the most powerful weapons and the harshest diseases
Then comes grief with its tear-stained face and its anguished cries,
Drowned out by the speed of life
It doesn't make sense.
What did we do wrong?
Why is Heaven against us?
Along came misery with its stone cold silence
Bereaved hearts long encased in an iron shell, if only to fend off
The cold gun in their hands and the ledge of the roof in front of them
If there is a Heaven waiting for us to see our loved ones,
Let our death be hastened.
But the body hesitates and the mind awakens from its slumber
Roused by a single word
No
Heaven is going nowhere, it can wait a while longer
Justice has waited too long.
First comes loss, then grief, and then despair…until all that's left is defiance.
Literature
Lost
Lost
in an empty world
without a meaning
that makes sense
Lost
in a filled world
that has a message
I don't understand
Lost
in a shadowed world
without any light
to guide me out
Lost
in a heartless world
where emotion is gone
since our farewell
Lost
in a cold world
where your heart
is beyond my reach
Lost
in a world
where I have to miss
the only one worth living for
Literature
Cemetery!
Sepia night crawls slowly by
Casting shadows softly sigh
Gravestones dominate terrain
Filled with humanities endless pain.
To the left stands Cedar grove
Distinctive shape quite colourless
Under tree one lonely grave
Occupant restless, soul to save.
Shadow emerged from grave ground
Glides down rows of buried dead
Hesitates before angel who prays
Intentions honourable, tears shed.
Kneeling now, ghostly prayer
Before sculpture of stone
Remembering what? we'll never know
Memories belong to the grave below.
Delice1941
7.6.12
Literature
Orpheus
Darkness encompassed me; high-vaulting fire
Leapt and burnt the vision from my gaze
But though I could not see, I strummed my lyre
Until the music swept away the haze
And I could stumble onwards through the mire.
Now I strum no more. What use are lays?
Save to remind me of my lost desire
That I betrayed--let silence fill my days!
For I, whose song once moved the gods to weep
No longer can make melodies from woe--
No dissonance expresses pain so deep
And no music can be as beautiful
As that which I have lost. Let others come
And fill the void with noise--I will not strum.
Suggested Collections
Featured in Groups
A very quick poem that I thought of just now, composed very quickly.
I thought of a small sentence:
First comes loss...then grief...then despair...until all that's left is defiance.
From there, I started typing and couldn't stop until now. The poem is what you make of it, although I think anyone who has lost something and wants to hit back at injustice can appreciate this poem. Especially those who decide to take arms when war or armed violence has destroyed their families and lives (e.g. in Afghanistan, Libya and Syria).
I hope you enjoy it. Comments will be much appreciated!
Suggested feedback questions for
1.) Are the lines in the stanzas well organised?
2.) Without reading the description, does the poem convey its message well?
3.) Do any of the metaphors/similes/literary techniques make sense or need improvement?
4.) Any issues with formatting or other errors?
For
I have given feedback A Sunrise Scene by here: [link]
EDIT
I have added additional lines to make the poem more emotionally powerful. I'm not sure if it's helped at all. Please do let me know.
I've been told twice that my work reads like a cross between prose and poetry. How can I remedy that without compromising my style?
I thought of a small sentence:
First comes loss...then grief...then despair...until all that's left is defiance.
From there, I started typing and couldn't stop until now. The poem is what you make of it, although I think anyone who has lost something and wants to hit back at injustice can appreciate this poem. Especially those who decide to take arms when war or armed violence has destroyed their families and lives (e.g. in Afghanistan, Libya and Syria).
I hope you enjoy it. Comments will be much appreciated!
Suggested feedback questions for
1.) Are the lines in the stanzas well organised?
2.) Without reading the description, does the poem convey its message well?
3.) Do any of the metaphors/similes/literary techniques make sense or need improvement?
4.) Any issues with formatting or other errors?
For
I have given feedback A Sunrise Scene by here: [link]
EDIT
I have added additional lines to make the poem more emotionally powerful. I'm not sure if it's helped at all. Please do let me know.
I've been told twice that my work reads like a cross between prose and poetry. How can I remedy that without compromising my style?
© 2012 - 2024 nightshade-keyblade
Comments34
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
this is a wonderful poem
oooh questions
1. yes
2. Yes very well done
3. They are quite captivating
4. Not that I see.
good job
oooh questions
1. yes
2. Yes very well done
3. They are quite captivating
4. Not that I see.
good job